I asked her when she first started looking at pornography. She looked up at me with a thoughtful but puzzled glance. “I was in 7th grade.” I knew her story. That’s when the abuse started: physical, emotional, and psychological. “How else did you escape?” I asked. There was some more silence. “Basketball. Fantasy novels. Video … Continue reading Pornography Saved Your Life.
I dialed the counselor’s phone number into my iPhone. I distinctly remember my thumb hovering over that little green call button. Shaking. For about twelve minutes. Or maybe it was only seven. I don’t know. I knew I needed help. The anxiety. The pornography. The panic. But to ask for help, for whatever reason, was, … Continue reading The Courage To Call
Four years ago, I was attending Western Theological Seminary and taking a class with Chuck DeGroat. One of the assigned readings was Telling Secrets by Frederick Buechner. What I didn’t realize at the time was that this seemingly random book would play a part in transforming my journey. Three graduate schools later (with no degrees … Continue reading The Secrets: Revisited
What do you do with your disappointment? What happens when life takes a turn you never expected? Where do you run when someone lets you down? What do you turn to when your relationship hurts more than it helps? How do you handle not getting the promotion, not being chosen for the investment, not being … Continue reading Hide & Seek: I’m Disappointed.
I have a new Uber story for y’all. For the past few months I have been doing most of my Ubering out on the coast in the Daytona Beach/New Smyrna Beach area. Needless to say, the craziness of Orlando wore me out. And to be honest, Ubering people who are on vacation is way more … Continue reading I’m a good person who made a bad decision.
I was driving down the highway a few days ago and found myself stuck behind a red jeep wrangler who was taking it way too easy in the left lane. On this rare occasion, it actually didn’t bother me much. Lately, I have been dreaming of driving an old jeep with the doors and top … Continue reading Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost, Right?
Two years ago I had the brilliant idea of trying to run three marathons in one year. Off the bat, you’re probably thinking to yourself, “There’s nothing brilliant about that idea.” You are completely right. It was actually a pretty stupid idea, but at the time it sounded like a fun challenge. With the help … Continue reading Numb.
My name is Matt Mulder and I’m a recovering pornaholic. I wish I could tell you that the temptation goes away. I suppose it does for some people, and that’s really awesome, but it never has for me. It’s amazing to me how you can know something is harmful to you, and the people around … Continue reading My name is Matt Mulder and I am a recovering pornaholic.